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October 6, 2009

Gotcha! You thought I was gonna write the definitive post, once and for all, about THE PROBLEM between THE EAST and–uh, what are we called? aren’t they just THE EAST and we’re just… us? wait, right, I remember–THE WEST. The post that you were expecting would have also included THE ANSWER to THE PROBLEM. Well, to be fair, I have THE MUCH-DESIRED MANUSCRIPT which contains exactly what you were expecting: that is, a description of THE STRUGGLE and its twin text which I will simply refer to as THE TRUTH. For reasons only known to me and a select few, I will not be sharing THE MANUSCRIPT with you. My bad. But yea, allow me to digress for a moment. I’m not sure how much you know about me: being the Iranian-American child-prodigy that I was, I actually wrote the aforementioned doubletext on my third birthday. Indeed, on this date my father and I arrived at the eastern shores (by eastern shores I mean, of course, one of JFK’s runways) of this blessed country. I don’t really remember it, but, as documented in a picture produced before the advent of digital photography, I was wearing a poofy blue jacket with synthetic fur lining its hood. Luckily, my father does remember the day; the following is his recollection, which he still repeats, word for word, to this day: “Saeid-joon, your eyes lit up like the ball of fire that is the sun, and everyone could see that you were having an out-of-body experience, a moment of divine insight, an epiphany, even, as James Joyce would put it.” He’s told me this story so many times that I find it difficult to focus on the words. I mean, being the Iranian-American prodigy that I am, these kind of things happen to me all the time. But, please, don’t sweat it: you seem nice enough, and I like what you’re wearing–not to mention all the attention that you’re giving me (wink wink).

2 Comments leave one →
  1. kate permalink
    October 10, 2009 3:19 AM

    this is great. keep up this energy. lets talk about a pamphlet (srsly)


  1. NO, FOR REAL THOUGH « thefictionalsaeidedward

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